My goal is;
Structure- make sure I plan and include the elements of beginning, middle and end.

Hi, I am Shannon and I want to tell you about something that happened to me, real and it actually happened.
I was six years old and my headband got stolen, my lovely mum bought it for me and I felt really bad, I liked that headband and to make it worse that was the first day I had my hair out at school. I lost my confidence in wearing my hair out so I never wore my hair out again.

Life went on, every day the same old me wearing my hair tied up.
Four years later I still wear my hair tied up, I still wonder where that headband went, it meant alot to me.
So I am ten now, my mum tells me I look beautiful with my hair out but I don’t believe her. She also tells me I should wear it out at school, but I say NO!!!!

Today the 5th of August 2009 I thought I would wear my hair out at school. Finally!
So I did, I scootered to school with my friend Caitlin. She said I looked pretty. I came into school feeling proud and then I went into class and some other girls said that I looked pretty too. Two boys in my class called me Chewbacca, off Starwars, and that really hurt my feelings. I felt horrible, then my friend Tunisia said I looked ‘freaky’ and two boys agreed. So much for my friend I thought to myself. Then the two boys said I looked like a ghost too! I was so close to bursting out in tears, I felt like the whole world was against me but I held it in and was brave but I still felt really bad. I tied my hair back up and went outside to play with my friends. They all asked why i had tied it back up. I told them why and my friend Molly went up to one of the boys and told him off!
They all said not to listen to them but I felt really angry and sad.

Now I am sitting here telling you my horrible story, and I know you wouldn’t like to be me. I am never going to wear my hair down again, I will wear my hair up to solve the problem.
But then again...who cares what they think!